http://chanelsy.blogspot.com/ :D MEMORIES <#3

♥ Thursday, January 10, 2008

My birthday eve celebration, i posted about how it goes on that day. So just update a few pictures and what gift did I get this year. =)

My small birthday cake, look nice yap, is you feeling hungry?

Cutting my cake showing that I older by 1 year liao.

My dear mei, we know each other for 5year liao. She is cute; good singing, and same as me love to think a lot kind of person. I am happy to know her and thx for her listen ear when I am down or happy =)

My group of friends =) start from the left is zhi ming, aiyun, hui jun, kaze, two more person (handa and yuehe) is outside the photos due to their are busy helping me take photos. Lol . And sorry for the blur photos, the person with good cameral have not send me the picture yet so that all I can share now is this blur picture, if he had sent me I may edit this post to update the pictures into here, so keep yourself updated ok. =)

This year I get a lot useful stuff, because I asking for it mah. =X therefore aiyun have bought me a wallet in black and is longer then my old wallet. When I start to use it, other may think I rich man, use so big wallet. Lol. But every time use the same kind also will be boring so never mind, make a new try. She designs a card for me too with my big picture on it; make me so shy when I got it. Lol. I not use to see old picture on the card some more so big and clear.

This the inside part of the wallet, as I got a lot card, last time shop a lot so get a lot cards but din really use lah. So she chooses this big and with a lot cardholder wallet easy for me to put in all my stuffs lah. As for the card, another 2 picture of me, one is taken with mei lah, and her love letter so touch after read I feel like crying. lol.MSG to AIYUN: thx a lot for your present, i love it is nice and useful, and your love letter is cold in design. Wish u all the best in your study, maybe is it hard but ren yi ren is going over. So jia you do not give up, other people say what u can just dun care do what you think is right. As for money, for you are still young can spent lah, but try your best not to busy so much of the unwanted stuff. i will stop my nagging here. lol. Thx for your gift muack.

This gift is from yuehe, another useful stuff. .hohoho. lol. I sound like aunty, help her promo her shop, but I not sure how to spell loh, if who want to know the band can leave me a tag message I can help you to ask her for the address or price. =)

Nice Japan kind of bag bag, she see me aunty till use school bag to put make up stuff, so bought this for me. Is nice I like it, but now I am too lazy to even make up so don’t know till when will I able to use this bag? Lol. And thx for a 22nd birthdays card ah, my 22nd birthday is over long ago, but she want me to stay young of cause I would not mind so just let it be bah, I am forever 22. =X hahaha.

Cute bear card, I was thinking lucky she never buy for me a panda or aunty card. Because I every time kena say by her, and thx for her lover note too. Dun worry I will fan u when I am free. Lol.Message to Yuehe: chio bu, lol.. Thx a lot for you this year gift ah, I love it a lot den every year u give me de. =X not that the last few year the gift not is but is I hardly wear so is a bit wasted lah, but for sure this year gift I will used it okay =) and dun worry i got any problem, no one to find i will think about u the. =X

Nice wrap gift, from hui jun and kaze, don’t know who did the wrapping? lol, not 100% good but is not bad wrapping lah.

Open it up scared me xia, is a hp loh. diao should not tell them I lose my hp, and say I need a useful stuff. I mean just buy some thing that cheap and useful I am happy enough. Some more both of them do have some money problem, so this gift really far too big liao. Dun worry will return your a big gift too. lol. This the 3rd card I get, I like this compare to yuehe. =X aiyun got my picture make me shy but this card is well design in the words of happy birthday in English and Chinese in the to page. Is it some thing different!

I not start to use this hp, when people give me some thing far to ex I will bear not to use. Maybe New Year I will open up and use bah, wah lau I very scare lost leh. Hp buy on own de I would not so sad when lost, just tat day the full day I had a lot bad lucky stuff going on that why very sad, if not I would not cry like hell. Still thx a lot for the gift, I dun need to wait for to year to change hp loh. lol. The love note is short and sweet too. Thx for been my friend, though kaze is doing it for someone not for me. =X still a big thx.Message to Jun & Kaze: next year dun need to spent so much liao, hope I would not lost any thing even I lost ah I think I would not dare to let you all know about it. Lol. Do not worry I will start saving for a big birthday gift for you all. Hope you all will like it too. Cheer. jun must jia you for life, work, study and your health, as for kaze jia you for your family problem and your love life bah. May this year 2008 a new start for all of us. =)

Another shared gift from handa and zhi ming. Lol. I can say that guy are really not good in choose clothes for gals man. =X still very nice of your so busy still have to go shop for my gift, is it useful lah I can wear as CNY clothes. haha.

This will look nicer den the top one. Lol. Because I scare of cold mah, and they are very thoughtful lah got think of buy this jacket for me. If not I really will die of cold when I just wear the top.

hummp the color mix together look a bit funny ah? Lol. But never mind lah I aunty yan, i wear also dun wear nice, no people wan to jio me so never mind what I wear no people want to see it. haha over all thx a lot for this gift. Love it too. Message to Zhi Ming & Handa: thx a lot to make 2 guy to buy gals clothes without other to help. .lol. Don’t know should i say ke lian your or pei fu your. Anyway this year make you so busy still go all the way to bedok to eat with us sorry ah, but to hope you all got enjoy the food and fun on that days. Because we will don’t know wait till when den can met up again.=) all the best for year 2008.

Another nice wrapped gift from my god sis, she don’t know what to buy for me, den happen some one buy for her watch so I ask for 1 too lah. I got a ODM watch which is good too but going no battery, some more is some one who bought for me which I still bear not to use it much. A bit stupid right but I am that kind of people.

I never think my jie will buy a ex gift for me, I was thinking she can get me a $10-$20 watch can liao, because can use I happy liao mah. So when I open this I was have another heart attach after see that hui jun gift. Lucky this present still not so ex. But the funny part is the watch no battery, maybe it put in the shop for too long therefore when my jie buy it was running but after pass to me it stop. Lol.

It a very lady kind of watch, I can say I love it but I very scared I will make mark on the watch, you know I not a lady kind of person lah. lol. But really thx a lot jie. hahaMessage to Fiona: muack muack love u lot, i know u always want me to love you a lot right. haha. Busy woman got to learn to take care yourself ok, working is important so as your health. Lol. Hope your work will be more and more fun, less stress and can work with different group of people lah.. aja aja fighting.=)

♥ Blogged @

1/10/2008 11:40:00 PM

♥ Wednesday, January 09, 2008

FRIENDS WHO wish me birthday on 08/01/08 at 00:00:00am got:
Hui Jun
at 00:09am (SMS)
msg is: hohoho? Happy Birthday! Don't be sad because u're one year older, cos 23 not really old ya! Heh heh so must treasure ur qing chun! Haha k lah, rest well nites =D
at 09/01/2008 1:24am (Posted at friendster comments)
Happy Birthday to you ~Sang-il Chookha-Hapneeda ~×£ÄãÉúÈÕ¿ìÀÖ ~~Otanjoubi Omedetoo ~!
(picture added)

Li Yan
at 00:11am (SMS)
msg is: Yoyo...I'm here to wish u Happy Birthday...Hope all ur birthday wish come true. Stay cute and happy always. Enjoy ur day.
at 09/01/2008 1:00pm (Posted at friendster comments)
Picture is added

Ai Yun at 00:11am (SMS)
msg is: Happy bdae!!! Muack muack! =)

Faezah at 00:13am (SMS)
msg is: hApPy B'dAe 2 u mAy EveRytHiNg GOes wEll AnD SmootHLy foR u!

Mandy at 00:48am (SMS)
msg is: Happy birthday, b jiejie..Wish you good health, and may you become prettie, cutier, and happier..Happy birthday..

Xu Xia at 07:52am (SMS)
msg is: Wahaha happy bday yan.hope this year will be your gd yr n also bless w gd health. I'll see u yeah.

Fiona jie at 08:07am (SMS)
msg is: Meiz happy birthday to you! :) i slept early yesterday so nv wish you at 12am... Now you 1 year older must b more Guai okay? :-P and love your jies more. Haha.

Yuehe at 08:25am (SMS)
msg is: Mornin yan.... Happy 22th birthday.... :) have a great day celeb ur big day... Muack

Handa
at 09/01/2008 8:34am (Posted at friendster comments)
Happy birthday to u,Happy birthday to u,Happy birthday to uuuu...Hi, just to drop by and wish u HAPPY BIRTHDAY.May all your wishes come true. Good luck!!!Happy Birthday!!!Next time then write more about you. See ya some how... Haha

Wei Ling at 08:40am (SMS)
msg is: Mornin birthday girl..

Cheng Ghim di at 08:59am (SMS)
msg is: your di here.. Happy birthday ar da jie. :)

Pei Xia at 8 Jan 2008 09:40:00am (Email)
msg is: morning.. n HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.. hope tat ur dream will come true.. den later enjoy urself ba.. hehe..

Pei Wen at 09:04am (SMS)
msg is: Yan, happy birthday to u!

Wen Bao at 10:07am (SMS)
msg is: Happy Birthday! SIN YAN :) May all your Wishes Come True.

Po Xiang at 10:40am (SMS)
msg is: Happy Birthday wor How's days at iap? Didnt see u online for quite sometime le

Kliff at 11:25am (SMS)
msg is: hey elaine kliff here..happy birthday. May u always look young n pretty haha..

Jennifer at 13:13pm (SMS)
msg is: Hi yan, happy birthday! How are you celebrating today?

Shi Jia at 09/01/2008 9:08pm (Posted at friendster comments)
Picture is added.

Kane at 22:51pm (SMS)
msg is: Just before today is over hopefully your wish will come true mei mei :) Happy birthday, one year older le :-P

Shireen at 09/01/2008 1:47am (Mail me thought friendster message)
msg is: HAPPY BELATE BIRTHDAY!!

Kwek Bo at 09/01/2008 8:54am (Mail me thought friendster message)
msg is: hi long time no see. how is your study n hope everything is on your plan. next time we meet out n talk ma. Wish u happy birthday.

Kelvin Deng at 09/01/2008 18:59pm (Called handphone)

msg is: wish me happy belate birthday, will treat me go watch movie to replace my birthday gift.=X

Nigel at 10/01/2008 22:51pm (SMS)

msg is: just wanted to wish you a happy belated birthday. may all your wishes come true!

Ang Ting at 12/01/2008 02:52am (SMS)

msg is: Yo..yan..4got 2 say happy birthday on ur birthday.hope u got gd memories on tat day..happy belated birthday :)

Let do some compare to last year who had greeted me

Date Time Name who wish me birthday

06-01-07 22:28 Ying Ying

07-01-07 08:23 XuXia

07-01-07 23:32 LiYan

08-01-07 00:02 Jing long

08-01-07 00:09 Fiona Jie

08-01-07 00:10 Yue He

08-01-07 00:18 Jane Lee

08-01-07 00:39 Ai Yun

08-01-07 08:51 Wei Ling

08-01-07 09:28 Pei Xia

08-01-07 13:00 Wency

08-01-07 15:50 Pei Wen

08-01-07 15:38 Jennifer

08-01-07 17:46 Mandy

08-01-07 23:35 Faezah

09-01-07 08:11 Kelvin Deng

09-01-07 07:40 Apple

So what the different have your see from my post? lol.. Some wish me last year din wish me, some suddenly sms and wish me. Ha ha but still very thankful for those who care to sms or friendster message or whatever way. Thank a lot *muack and hug*.

Anyway din enjoys yesterday, of cause not due to my friends but is the weather keeps raining almost the whole day. I dun like raining day, some more it rain the full day yesterdays making my mood from good also became bad. Luckily my birthday eve din rain so much. Anyway went eat sushi buffer with my god sis and xuxia, reason they free yesterday and they dun want go too far place to eat therefore we met up yesterday to go eat sushi buffer la. A bit sad the buffer is costly, 3 person bill was $90+ liao which is my 1 month+ food money. I going to skip a few lunch to save up a bit. This call sweet 1st den bitter (先甜后苦), who ask me wanted to enjoy the good food and so on therefore now I need to suffer to save up the money and eat less of the good food la.=( But I say only still don’t know I can make it or not, as I am a person love to eat a lot. Unless I at home doing noting, maybe I would not feeling hungry so easy, if like that I can cut down my fat and save money $_$ lol. That what I wish for la but it is some thing not easy to do. I should message yuehe see how she can make it. Anyway I still not yet fully open my gift yet, as this 2 days I go out till late after got home was tired, thought I did not sleep right away is because I used to sleep late bah. Therefore even I got home I am a death meat but still can not fall asleep, yet I am lazy to open up the gift to see and take picture. Ha ha ha I very funny hor, do not worry I will try to take the picture of my gift as soon as possible. So that all for today, people who wish me late I will edit this post to add you into it so too not worry I would not forget about you even you send a late greeting.

♥ Blogged @

1/09/2008 11:59:00 AM

♥ Tuesday, January 08, 2008

23 year old liao today and is the 8th of 2008, this number look nice but never think of buying this as the 4D number. So I was asking myself 23 liao and 2008 liao what I want for this year, what I aim to do this year, what kind of life am I asking for, what kind of life I want to live on? I do not have big dream like be a singer or idol because I know I am not up to a standers, as for became a company big boss I not clever so forget it. I hope to have just a small own world with money, stress, and etc free.lol. I like asking for too much ah, but we human are living for what? Last time if my family around may be I have to work for support them now I am alone I do not know what my target for my life. But looking at all my friends are or had planed for this New Year 2008 I also got to start thinking it, so what is my little plan? Must be thinking why I say is a little plan because big plan maybe end up I not able to achier it so I dun have a high hope of myself can do what kind stuff.

So what really is my resolution?
Jan – Feb I can finish up my IAP and pass to get out of NYP!
Feb – June maybe resting study for so many year really tired need some time to rest to walk for longer way. So I maybe saving and going to Malaysia or other place with different group of friends and I wanted to cut down my fats, now busy every day dun has the time to excises loh. Some hope that free month I will go do some work out bah.
June - … this will be the month I more busy bah, as I will need to start saving money, look for a full time job, maybe go for a language course and get my driving cert.

That my full plans for my next year and here is my other resolution of this year.
Health is important to me, as no one is going take can of me when I am sick or what, I try before when I am sick I had to make all my way down to see a doctor on my own. That was my grandma not around, my uncle too old some more his hearing got problem so a bit hard to communicate with him. So when fall sick to me is very scarily, I promise all my friends I will try to take good care of myself okay.
Wealth I not a person asking for wealth, but of cause got more money who would not want it right, therefore I hope to have a good pay job and save as much as I can for me to open a shop and go for over sea trips.
Study by mid of Feb will end; therefore I hope can pass well. Who will wish to stay another 3month to half year to retake those fail IAP or FYP. And if I am going to take up the language course of cause hope I would not be wasting money yet I do not understands what I am learning. So hope I am able to learn it well, and better can take a test and get a cert of the language that I am going to learn.
Family thought now I left with no one, but my granduncle will still need me. He very old 80+ and no child or close friends to take care of him. But till now is more like he taking care of me then I look after him, as every meal is he cook, washing clothes, painting wall is done by him. I am like guesses go out early in the morning and back home late. Even morning I am at home still end up he doing all the stuff then I am doing.
Friends to me important as I say before without family around all I left with are my friends. I hope I have more time for them, as now I always busy working from morning till now, if really got friends wanted to date me I may reject most of the time due to I had to earn enough to pays for all my bills. I really wish I can spent more time with them, I miss my secondary and ITE school life, which also can hang around with them do shop or just chitchat.
Career to me is just a job to work and get money; I am a very easygoing person lah not asking for high pay or easy job. But I dun wish that to get a job which cant working happy with the teams, I try before when working in the pau shop which our lady boss who like to take bad at the back of people, if not due to she my friend aunty and I also in need of money I sure quit. I dare not think too much of kind of job I can get, as the economy now is not too good, when we asking for good job and pay, the company also choose a better person who can handle the work with low pay. Now work getting hard and hard to find then last time.
Love to me maybe not so much important then friendship, as BG readership can break of easily over a small case, over some one or even over who is putting more affect. Is some thing very hard to control and maintain. I will wish my white house prince come faster but not for another heart break relationship again. So I will take my own sweet time bah, anyway I not chio I choose people so as the other are choosing me.=X

So over all that the targets for 2008, hope I can make it, and now I am going to share my 08/01/2008 birthday celebration. I had an early celebration yesterday with a group of friends, mostly are from the ITE side they are Aiyun, Yuehe, Handa, Zhiming, and added in Huijun and Kaze who one is my secondary friend and the other is game friend. Total of 7 people include me lah, we went to bedok 85 markets to have our dinner. I am the one who choose the place; I hardly plan to my celebration as not every year I have the time or mood to celebrate. So this year I happen to be free as my birthday fall on weekdays so easy to take leave den weekend so I jio this group who they know each other and easy to mix the come out have a meal loh. As for other like ITE got Peixia who is vegetarian, and Huisheng who is zai nan so I never jio them to come. Some other like primary, secondary friends who do not mix well with other or they are busy on that day, or I don’t wish to ask them along de will have to make it another day with them liao. Ok back to yesterday, so we was plan to met at 8pm at BK MRT but aiyun and yuehe came early so they went to McDonald wait for us, den I reach just a bit later follow by handa, huijun and kaze, zhiming was the only ke lian guy waiting for us at MRT. And very funny we all like all short of money almost all need to redraw money, after that we went met up aiyun and yuehe at the interchange area. Then we chitchat along the way walk to the bus stop to take a bus down to the 85 markets and is very luck that we walk till the bus stop the bus come some more is 2 double level de, so we group of 7 people can get into the bus and even had sit for use. Which mostly I go I had to stand up de loh. A few stop we get down, and Singapore is small so few of them know about this market and what kind of foods is nice over there. So we found a place and we got a help of aunty to put nicely the table and chair for use we (aiyun and me) went to order for drink and foods. They’re some extra people who wanted to drink coffee-tea, but most of us are drinking sugar canal end up he had to change his drink. Lol. Then we went to order the 4 dish of food but due to one store did not open we only order 3 dish but is was very full liao lah. And my ITE group of guys they eat like girls, we girls side eat the foods finish up faster then them loh, is funny and not used to guys eat slow then girls. After finish up the food but bring out the cake for me to sing birthday song, this time only 3 language birthday song that English, Chinese and Korean, don’t know where is the Japan birthday song gone to? Or is it that song only song for someone only. ha ha. Anyway the funs are at the back, we finish up the cake we took some time to take group photos is fun to take group photos then taking alone. We had a few shots la, but some picture are blur due to we move too much. Will wait for them send me then upload it for your see. Oh yap received a lot gift this time, as they buy on their own, most of them I know their gift is what but I have not open huijun give me de, as she wrap till very nice. Maybe wait till I get most of my present liao will open up take a picture and show it to you all. Wow another long post going to get complain from aiyun saying I post too long till she don’t feel like reading, therefore I better stop here, will go on other days. V n_n

♥ Blogged @

1/08/2008 04:03:00 PM

♥

Today I am counting down, not for New Year but my birthday. Oh my god I am getting old. How? So fast my birthday is here, get a few gift from my dear friend liao. This year a num of the gift was I saying out what I wan de. But hor I dun really care is the gift ex or not ex but is it useful. lol, u can say I act like an aunty, talk like an aunty, wear like an aunty. When human not rich, saving is the first thing come to mind. Last time I spent $ like a week to buy both you and I weekly, now not even one of the weekly, I will buy unless I know it had apple maybe I will buy or ask from people 1st. as for food also de same, I last time dun like to eat home cook food, now also loh, but due to saving of money I can eat food cook food for pass 1 year liao, bring it to work just add hot water and finish up the rice. As for clothing I think I no change lah only that now I keep wearing old clothe then getting myself new cloth. So this year I write in blog I would need some thing useful, what do I mean useful stuff? Item like wallet, bag, cloths, shoes, watch and etc.so till now I confirm that aiyun and yue he had get me wallet and mark up bag, den I asked my jie get me a watch I bear not wear the watch apple bought, and asked xuxia to get me bag. As for other group of friend I not too sure like, example shireen she asked what to buy for me but I have not tell her what I wan, huijun and handa side leh is they din ask me at all so wait and see what will I get bah. U may think what wah lau need to ask people for birthday gift till like that mah, but some time people give u some that u dun use, and some more is for display that kind, my house got enough worm liao dun wish the worm get into my birthday gift loh. But useful stuff diff, as I use it thought the worm go in I cant stop it also lah, but unlike the display de I like so scare it will full with worm end up I have to throw it away. hai I wan worm free who can came and help me? Sob sob. Anyway today met up group of friend go eat lah, I treat because I the older mah, lol no lah just this year got a mood of celebrate if not u can see that I can keep myself at home doing noting on my birthday, dun ask me why because I would not know it too. Girl always had problem with their mood swing. =X

Today a bit lazy to blog, reason maybe I am too hungry?! lol, my leader too busy today even there other people around in the office but he not around I scare there call they would not care so I stay till he came back, and that was 1pm+ liao. He asked me had go for lunch or not I say no, he did ask me wanted to go first but I reject, u must be think i complain hungry why din I wan to go for lunch? Because I wan leave my stoma for tonight good food, anyway not really what good food lah just go to a market at bedok area which the food there not bad, so and some friend study near there but don’t know what time he end school lah =X. and nowadays my stoma siao siao loh, some time hungry till eat 3 meal, yet some time dun even feel like eating any food. But now for sure i am really hungry ah hope i would not faint in my office. no engry to type much, i go around the webs to read stuff lah. blog again soon to let your see what gift did I get.

♥ Blogged @

1/08/2008 12:31:00 AM

♥ Friday, January 04, 2008

Talk about my mum, still have the story of my dad and ah ma to say. So start with my dad 1st, he a kind of da nan ren mean he say some thing u better follow. Therefore I quite scare of him lah, he dun scold, dun beat, but his nagging is scarily. lol. So after my mum left I din turn out is very good girl, I dun smoke, drink, fight but I waste money on chasing star. I dun support Taiwan, Japan, Korean but I support Singapore star. They not framers but is easy to got close and talk to them. So what happen was my dad is a saving king, his $0.05 is bigger den a cow weal that what my ah ma always like to say about him. He also good in remember stuff, some thing happen few year ago he can still take out and talk about, for example there a year I learn going to ice skate so I jio my cousin to join in but who know end up that she a very out going kind therefore end up I always accompany her till late den go home. Her mum know about we go out together and went tell my dad about it as if is I bring her to became bad making her go out early morning and went home late, but even w/o me bring she that kind out going girl also cant stay at home loh. And just due to this I kena nag by my dad for year asking me why bring her go so far, never inform him and so on. That is just one of the case, den next time I went to a shopping mall to chase star kena my dad side aunty and uncle saw it, they went to tell my dad again, this time same he nagged at me. Asking me spending money on them do they know, and do they care, when i am sick, when i need money, when I am hungry who are giving me all this. So he trying to say that is a waste of money to chase star, last time I maybe dun agree now getting old liao will think bad ya loh, I wasted so much time and money on them is a bit waste lah. I count lucky lah, I like apple till now so far she also be good buy 1 time birthday gift for me treat me go eat sushi, if I like aiyun go on s.h.e they know your look buy know your name or not is another problem. And how much is they earning and how much is we earning, we spent those money are all into their pocket only. Maybe now I old liao plus no people are giving me money to use therefore I am using my hard earn money so now not so siao and spending so much on them, now even I weekly or u weekly I din buy leh. So due to this two case kena nag by my dad for years when I did some tin wrong. There are other case which is I went to McDonald to work, lucky that he din nag much just saying that I should told him about it, I keep a lot thing from him like having boyfriend, working McDonald. But my luck not very good leh always kena people saw it, work at McDonald is my relative saw it went to tell my dad, bf is my dad friend saw it but bf he din ask much bah, I don’t know y but he din ask much den I dun say so much just say is friend.=X so a lot people think I have no problem with my family I can say your are all wrong, every family has is own problem de just that u can see or not. i dun like his nagging, and saving, he save money but also ask us to save along. There a time in secondary every one start to get hp yet my hp is using my hard save money to get a 2nd hand pone with a top up card, as I am not old enough to sign line and I dun have the money every month to pay the bill. He will always tell me, some of the stuff we dun need den dun any how spent money on it, last time I dun really listen as u try open hand there sure money who will care to go save? But now I change till I dun look like myself too, as every one not around all kind of bill have to pay on your own, how nice the stuff is also no mood to buy to use. yuehe always like to call me aunty, u think I dun wan to wear more nice and beta, if I dun need to worry about my house spending, just I earn how much I spent how much of cause I am able to enjoy and buy stuff, eat good food. Those who know me before will know I last time how good in spending de loh. haha I not finish complaining of my dad, he ah a supper prayer which every day 3 time and some time even going to other people house. If his life can save I will sure want to say him pray so much and eaten veggie for so many year but when your time up you also cant be save your life. But now say what also no use. He very nagging, maybe is due to my mum not around he scare my ah ma cant control me, but is true lah what I doing outside my ah ma also dun really know. But he still very care for me, when I sick he will ask me rest or really need he will bring me see doctor, he give me enough money to spent for my study even some time I am ask more den what I really need. He saved enough money for me to use when he and my ah ma not around so that I dun have so much money problem, he leave me with a flat which he had paid it up. So a nagging dad yet is most caring for me, for my study, for my further, for my living for been along.

So when he was sick having cancels I did my best to accompany him, he dun wants to raise his life for a more detail check up I din stop him. I hate hospital due to my mum reason, yet w/o it my dad also can’t cure. He coughing form morning till nigh, he thin a lot but I did not noted, I am a blur a unless child. Even he is sick I cant do much for him all I can is go back eunos to accompany him but I cant leave my ah ma with the 80+ age alone too. Of cause is due to I am more close with ah ma den dad so I will choose ah ma den my dad. But when he sick I see him getting weaker and weaker, from he can work till he had to give up working to rest at home, he worry to leave me alone he try going around look for Chinese doctor for cure. That time I 18+ liao know how to think, but due to my mum case so when he say worry about going hospital for detail check is not save therefore i also would not want him to suffer ah. But what we wish for god may not hear it, so a few month later his health getting from bad to worse. He starts eating less and less sleeping more, even praying he leave it to me which himself resting in the room. Finally he wanted to go for a detail check but for cancel this kind problem just 1 day late can kill your life. So but the time he agree to go for a detail check is far too late, which he is too weak to do all those kind of check up. That mean they are unable to cure it any more, so he end up waiting to die. I quit angry over myself that time, if only I can ask him go for the detail check maybe there is still hope? I not sure, but that time when I accompany I found he is really lonely. After my mum death he did ask me if he remarry I mind? Of cause I din give him an ans as who dun mind right, but when he going to die then I know I been selfish. I never really go home accompany even find reason saying I busy over school work not going home to stay over night, he also did not say me only asked me study hard and take care. He is nagging yet he cares for me, I know inside my heart yet I cannot treat him nice due to my playful. I never care for him when he is sick, he lonely at home, he stress or angry over work. I never ask much about him, or can say I know noting much of him, he just my dad, he very nagging and crazy about praying, save money king that all I know about him. What he like to eat, what song, drama or what stuff he like I don’t know at all. His last 1month go to a home to stay, see him getting weaker, feed him eat with very small mouth, cant too hot, cant too big spore, de food must small small pieces. I really not use to take care of people till like that, as my mum coma all I need to do is talk or clear her hand some time. But my dad is from he still able walk to toilet till he need stay on the bed to do his business. That time I finish up my ITE got along holiday yet i spent almost all my time and money stay with him. Some more sick people their mood not good, and we young people dun like listen to scolding kind i was sad and hurt by him. My aunty say him, den he say sorry to me, the very first time say sorry, giving me red packet for my birthday and also the last. When he around my mum and me never celebrate birthday de, I mean there no cake, no gift but he will wish me or bring me go eat lah. I been hopping to get a normal dad like other, who he so crazy praying, den we will have really more time together like other dad will bring their child out for a walk, chit chat a bit the best is he and ah ma can live together. if you ask what my dream are, that will be taking a family photos, in my photos album there only a 5year old or younger family photos with my dad, mum and ah ma. Till 12year old we never take another picture.

Today my mood bad, not due to writing my family death but some one had passed away. He not my family, not my friend, not even some one I know. He just a actor, but a cute guy I like going his blog to read because he always post happy stuff unlike me all this emotion kind of post. But sad to say he passed away today, after accompany her mum go for check up got home for a rest he sleep till out of breath, by the time send to hospital was too late. Life short, I understand that when I am age of 12 but till 21 then I know how short was it when just 1 year later my grandma also passes away after my dad leaving my granduncle and me now. I am count as lucky I know but human away not happy with what we have, therefore I am unhappy with all my family member not around, with just a few good friends, with my poly result, with my money, with a lot a lot more. Who can tell me how? I am tired, I wish to rest but I cant because I no people letting me to yi kao.

you care to know more about him the actor who pass away today, go to his blog http://mcking13.spaces.live.com/default.aspx to leave a msg to him and his family. i believe he will get to read it.

♥ Blogged @

1/04/2008 11:38:00 PM

♥ Thursday, January 03, 2008

So fast 2008 liao, counting down 5days to my 23rd birthday and also the year I finish my study to go out look for a full time job. Time is running very fast, how I wish I am able to go back kid at the age of 1 till 12 bah. Because my life changed after the year 1997, when I just 12 year old kid, and is I 1st time face my mum death. That time I am still very young don’t know how sad is it w/o her around because I since young was taking care by ah ma therefore once a week see her do not make me feel very sad. But when I got older, I start to wish I had her around to teach me stuff. When I finish my PSLE none can give me a idea what school to choose, when I din do well for study my mum will worry and help me find tuition teacher, when I wanted to go other friends place to stay over night or going other couture she will help me lie to ah ma so ah ma would not worry for me. Now I really miss her from the bottom of my heart, my memory of her is very short till I can’t recall now. She a lovely wife, always see her listen to my dad when he asked her to do stuff, she don’t any how spent money due to my dad wanted us to save the money. She care about my study, worry for my homework but she also like bring me go out if she is well. Remember the place from the old photos some I may not recall any more but we went to a lot palaces, I can remember she bring me to her office, shopping mall, bring me go eat, when she scold me, when she ask me study yet I read the book till fall a sleep at home, when new year she took my red packet w/o telling me a reason I cried like hell. As my dad care more about praying therefore when my mum unwell he only let her stay at home alone if I am around will stay at home accompany her. I know noting about their love story most are hear from my ah ma, as I not close with dad and mum so we dun share prob. so most sad thing happen when I was enjoying myself, I was 12 that year still a young and cheerful girl who love to play going out. Therefore that year that this cramping event that the prayer side held, I was happily going with the help of my mum cover me from mine ah ma saying that I went home accompany them 3days then will come home. I had a lot of fun with my age of people, that the only week I din go back to eunos that house due to the cramping and that the last help she given me. Because just the day I back to ah ma house from cramp she called to check did I back home safe, but she was unwell due to asthma. I hear liao of cause will worry did ask her for her hospital room so that I am able to go there take a look at her, going to hospital and stay there mean her asthma is bad. But that time I still so young never think so much, when she say don’t want me know her room as she scare I will go tell ah ma and let her worry. Of cause I never think so much seem she in hospital should b sound and safe therefore I din really asked her again to tell me, I even happily ask her that next week can if go to my cousin house to stay over night and she agree. We end the talk and that the last talk between us that I will never forget till now, I can forget about what happen in my primary school life but I will never forget the last call I get from my mum. After that just the next days, my dad came and inform us about my mum went coma in the hospital. I was surprise as she was still sound aright calling me to talk over the phone yesterday but how come every thing change over one night. That time I still young only hear that they say she due to at night went restroom but asthma attack and faint in the toilet till the nurse found her, there lag of oxygen in her brain that cause her to be coma. That kind of age, u understands what does a coma mean? I dun really understand, was thinking dun need worry so much she will wake up one day, every day accompany ah ma go c her talk to her after weeks over I start getting worry. Telling her I dun need a computer any more I dun need going out play I will try study hard but what i say she dun seem hear it for a month, she event went for a operation due to she cant breath with her nose. Open a hole in her huo long just to let her breath to keep her live going on. Still she cant take it on 26+ June early morning she give up her life, my dad went to school pick me up to go see her, my very 1st time staying in the hospital cold room to wait for in charge setting the death to bring her body for clear up and putting on make up for her. I was still very young therefore a lot of stuff is my dad in charge to do, I only staying there to look after the place. The very 1st time I touch my mum hand that feeling so cold and hard. I remember it till now, till now I dare not touch my dad and ah ma cold hand as it makes me feel I really lose them.

7 year pass with all the sadness gone, time really can heal the feeling some more is just a kid memory. Therefore I would not any time think of my mum and feeling sad. I live happily with all my friend around, still the same old me dun like staying at home, love going out late making my dad and ah ma worry some time. They scare I learn bad thing, thought that time I love play a lot, going out but yet I never get to learn a single bad thing like smoking, drink or fighting. But my study bad my dad know, he din aim high of me or ask me to study till how good. He only hope I can be a good girl, study good enough so that go out able find a good job, dun been like he or my mum working from day till night. I not a clever girl, study to me is not an easy job too but I try my best. I fail my sec 3 due to English and not enough subjects for me to go up sec 4. My dad sad for my result but he din scold me. Therefore the next year I did pass, of cause not pass English but I get 4 subject pass that are able to pull me up to sec for. And my English giving me problem again, passed 4 subject with enough point to go sec 5 just due to English I will have to retake my sec 4. My mum not around, all the study I been learning on my own, a lot people will say they also what some parent they also did not student much they cant teach their child too. I only can say I am stupid bah, therefore I go choose going to ITE. At 1st very scare not due to I did badly for my study will get scold from my dad, but is going to ITE what kind of friend can I mix with? My secondary school most are ah bang and ah lian, I dun like mix with this kind of people unwell some are really kind, but just due to they used to that kind of life but they treat people very nice. When I in sec 3 got this girl mei zheng she is one of an example, but till now so far I din got to see this kind of person any more. Or maybe I have closed my heart, because I also find I getting harder to mix around with people. Lucky that time shireen which from NT class she also going to ITE, I cant recall how did I know her, maybe due to morning we always sitting in font then we start to talk and be friend bah. So that time she the only one going to the same ITE with me, as for my other friend mostly going up to sec 5 or going to student poly. I am all alone, feeling down but life still need to go on, my ah ma don’t know about study she think the longer you study the beta is it as for my dad is he leave it to I choose what I wan. So in school life I am happy that I can always get 1-2 close friend in it, like primary I got pei wen now we no longer that close but she still my friend lah when we free will still met up. Sec I got even more like hui jun, shireen, xu xia but also due to diff reason now I cant say close the left jun. as for ITE i get to met yue he and aiyun, till poly is pei xia bah. In ITE I not so close with her as she got friend there and she eat vegetarian, therefore we do not mix that much, but till poly we happen to be the same class, and really thank for her help when I facing my family problem but she helped me with the note need when I did not go school. Thought she till now still not my close friend but she is always a friend that I never forget. Today talk a lot of my whole life liao, was wanted to talk about my dad and ah ma but just now when i write my mum my tear is keep coming out of my eyes. So I not going write it out today, when i feel like to share will write bah. So u wants to know why I am sure a busy girl, working till no day no night wait for my update bah. And to all my friend thx for all your care and concern, maybe some time I am asking for too much. I just feeling lonely, u all always have a family member at home waiting to ask for your need but me if I dun tell people my problem no body will know about it. So a bit of your words and your way of action can make up a diff day of mine, I try to be more open minded to share friend, stuff then trying to keep it to my own. Hope you all can understand been alone is not easy.

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1/03/2008 01:14:00 PM

♥ Wednesday, January 02, 2008

OMG so fast year 2008 and just a few days more I going older another 1year old. This year is very important for me, I finish up my NYP course in mid February, therefore need to go look for a job. So my aim for this year is going enjoy my life after February rest till June den go look for a job, what kind of job I still don’t know. So my life between Februarys to June going to save up money to go for a Malaysia trip with a different group of friends’ lah. No money to go far place, if not I wish going to Taiwan, Hong Kong, Japan, Korean, I like Asia place den ang mo place. Hope I can find a good job for myself to pay the entire bill and can save money for the trip I wanted to go. Anyway this year 2008 for a good and fun start with apple, haha she my idol who I start to like her when I am age of 15 bah, so I has support her about 9year long. The last day of 2007 I was working at both place, and that day my sis was happen work with apple in the same drama for that date. She told me that apple had some event going on at night 9pm but she doesn’t know where and what kind of event is it. As for me, after I been alone for 2year busy till no days and night I become less supportive lah, so seem I don’t know where is her location I would not going around ask or find. And I never think that she will have event in Singapore also. But after a few hour later apple fan message me about apple is going to a count down event at huogang mall from 9pm onward, so it mach with the timing my sis say apple event too. But I end work at 9.30pm lah so I can not rush down there and last min a bit hard to jio people pei me go for the count down, so here want to thank jun, kaze and ting for their accompany. So we met at orchard area, but they are late and I had close door and went to buy bubble tea therefore met them at CK Tang bus stop lah. I was wanted to take MRT from orchard to hougang, but jun say there still time we can walk down to dhoby ghaut to take NE line. And I understand that she had to save money too, I had make her come to orchard and now ask her take train rush there like a bit unfair, and apple is there for count down she should stay till quit late bah. So we walk from the orchard all the way to PS, this year all a lot count down event are hold in vivo that area so orchard got people but dun really had that kind of count down feel. Anyway we got to the huogang mall for count down also no new year feel, because there small some more they make the stage 2 story high which I cannot really see some perform at the side, and there no many people also. We rush there about 11pm I din see watch so is about there lah, there are star hosting got chen hui hui those not so hong star. We waited for some time and I worry not sure is apple still at the event there, went to the packing area saw her car den I an xin to go back stage and wait. I wanted to take a look at her new car got what kind of stuff in it, but when I getting close got bao an saw us and he seem coming over, so I stop myself getting close to her car and we go back to stage. We will like very bored loh, because they host ask those que some are easy but some are hard like hell till who will go understand. Therefore we sit down chitchat a bit to wait for apple come out. not high at that time so we din talk a lot lah.whaha till 11.30pm bah finally she out to go on stage for some talking, but I din really hear busy take photos and angry over my dig camera as is very lag I don’t know what is the reason. And at this time hui jun told me about a guy in font me, he use hp or what to take video off the star bottom. I was like diao he siao ah, what so nice to take he dun have meh, but i also no time to hack care lah. The stage start to ask people to go on stage to wish people in different languish loh, they called about 9over people liao then I wanted to go see apple more close mah so try my luck and wang shi nan saw my hands up asked me go up loh. When got onto stage I go boo apple, she din scared lah but was suspire that I was there. She wish me and hug me for New Year loh, very shy lah because go on stage with so many people. I was asked to stand in mid of stage but I hide at back loh, as for apple she busies hosting so we on stage did not talk a lot. I wait till the last person then was kena caught by chen tian wen loh, if not I can dun need to say any greeting the. haha but I only say 1 greeting then they will ready to count down, from 30sec count down loh, I was like diao still so long. whaha. And I on stage a bit scare also as they all are holding the pop stuff is like so scarily don’t know will kena me or not, therefore at count down time I keep holding my ear to stop all the sound. A bit stupid lah, and thx to dear jun help me took video of the stupid me on stage. After that we all finish the count down and wait for a photo taking but i guess it din take lah as the cameraman say no batty. Lame loh, so after awhile we all went down stage. And me this ah goong din take hp along with me so went down stage I also blur don’t know where did jun they are at. Lucky they are standing at e same place to wait for me. We den wish each other and took some lame picture, while waiting for apple to come down the stage. Waited for so long thinking can go talk more to her but mcs really power had a very portative bao mu loh, she stop people getting close to the star, send the star go into their car and dun let the gou ji to took photo or sign for a long time. I almost kena same as the gou ji cant chat much de but heng is they busy with nick sheng I talk a bit with apple lah, what we talk cant say here, no lah just wish her and told her about I send stuff to her office ask her go check. After that group gou ji finish over there, they come and aim at apple want to ask her to sign and photo taking. As just now on stage I din take picture some more down at stage those picture I take are not nice too so I request apple let me take 1 picture. She really nice to post for me and when she seem I got problem with the photo take she asked me want to take another 1 or not but I say dun need lah, because her bao mu there and she tomorrow still need to go filming in morning dun wan her stay too late for me, and all my dear friend waiting for me too. But ke lian those gou ji loh, when she post for me and taking to me she never turn her head to them or let them take photos leh, is sweet of her to treat me so good lah. But that group of people was very unhappy liao loh, of cause not to me but with the bao mu, lol keep scolding and scolding. And I just dun understand they keep support star every day and they go act extra too, every time see the star they not sick of it? If ask me every day see apple I think she not sian I sian 1st. another make me feel sweet is when jun brother told me that the bao mu stopping people take picture or what he hear apple told her say never mind because I am her fan/friends I not sure lah haha but she hugged me 3 time. i think that the most sweet of her thought she never message me any xmas/NY greeting but 3 hug have cover it up liao, maybe I not so siao like last time will get sad and unhappy over some tin, now really long time dun see her i still will feel high lah but not so siao as last time liao bah?i hope son if not going 23 year old liao leh still wan me so siao to go her promo like the young gal and boy meh. After the count down most of us hungry lah so we went to eat, and thx kaze for been the head of huogang if not we also dunno can go where to eat loh.haha and once thx the 3 of u who accompany me go home also. Will post up photo when got home if you are bored can read this post 1st haha.

This is my old post but i din blog on that day happen on 27/12/2007 thur I was thinking not to blog, as for the pass few weeks I blog a lot. Still end up I was here typing my boring life story for you all to read it up, of cause I know that my blog no people will wanted to read. As my English too weak therefore even there people who wanted to come read up my blog after a few line they will give up reading it. Even myself I read my own story can read till falling asleep. Because I always got a lot of words mistake, or the sentence I form are not good. My friend aiyun scare I write long post, because my English not good if write too long post, she read liao dun even understand what I posting. I got think of going to study English after I my NYP life, but I always worry that after I learn who can I use on?? My friend most are busy, I mean we dun have the right timing meting up. Ask me read storybook, I will scare I fall asleep, and till now I still not sure going to work in office or not. So it seem is a waste of my time, therefore I give up to study that, will go take up another languish, I still not sure want study which type. Both Japan, Korean sound nice, other I would wish taking up is Cantonese. I like to learn 1 big reason is due to my grandma, she since young taking care of me learning to speak Cantonese will let me think of her. I dun wish to lose a languish skill that she teach me. Thought I think I learn that is useless and some more no friends who can speak that to me with that loh, but maybe it will be useful when I watch Cantonese show? Ha. I now watch Taiwan drama more den Singapore drama, din even tough on any Hong Kong show, so over all if I go learn that is a waste. =( Never mind la, now till mid Feb. I still have 2month to think about how I going to spent my time after mid Feb., I only know a lot people is dating me to go Malaysia, Hai my pocket going to have one big hole after Feb. but I never give myself a rest I think soon or later I will gone crazy too. Haha. Anyway that is just a plan, reason still have to see my dear friend are they able to save enough money to go for the trip or not. Staying in Singapore is costing us spent a lot some more want go oversea spent, I now really hope there a rich guy falling from the sky. Too bad Singapore too small, I not chio also want to fish rich guy wait long long lah, just hope my white house faster came.

Talk to too about feb which is not happen yet, so now talk about what or can say how bad lucky am I. Wake up at 7.30am but still feel like sleep din get out of bed till 8am I guess, rushing for timing I faster went wash up and go out of house to caught my bus. Got onto the bus wanted to listen to my MP3 FM who know due to yesterday I listen till is no batted, so I not able to on it listen and the novel book aiyun lend me I finish up. So bored on bus and still feeling tired I took a nap, who know that this nap make me late almost half-hour for work. When the bus is going to Newton, far east I am still very awake is just closing my eyes never really sleep, den it went on to plaza singapora, I guess I did open my eyes?! As the person next to me had go off bus bt i went back to sleep again, therefore end up i late half hour to work.

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1/02/2008 01:50:00 PM