http://chanelsy.blogspot.com/ :D MEMORIES <#3

♥ Friday, January 04, 2008

Talk about my mum, still have the story of my dad and ah ma to say. So start with my dad 1st, he a kind of da nan ren mean he say some thing u better follow. Therefore I quite scare of him lah, he dun scold, dun beat, but his nagging is scarily. lol. So after my mum left I din turn out is very good girl, I dun smoke, drink, fight but I waste money on chasing star. I dun support Taiwan, Japan, Korean but I support Singapore star. They not framers but is easy to got close and talk to them. So what happen was my dad is a saving king, his $0.05 is bigger den a cow weal that what my ah ma always like to say about him. He also good in remember stuff, some thing happen few year ago he can still take out and talk about, for example there a year I learn going to ice skate so I jio my cousin to join in but who know end up that she a very out going kind therefore end up I always accompany her till late den go home. Her mum know about we go out together and went tell my dad about it as if is I bring her to became bad making her go out early morning and went home late, but even w/o me bring she that kind out going girl also cant stay at home loh. And just due to this I kena nag by my dad for year asking me why bring her go so far, never inform him and so on. That is just one of the case, den next time I went to a shopping mall to chase star kena my dad side aunty and uncle saw it, they went to tell my dad again, this time same he nagged at me. Asking me spending money on them do they know, and do they care, when i am sick, when i need money, when I am hungry who are giving me all this. So he trying to say that is a waste of money to chase star, last time I maybe dun agree now getting old liao will think bad ya loh, I wasted so much time and money on them is a bit waste lah. I count lucky lah, I like apple till now so far she also be good buy 1 time birthday gift for me treat me go eat sushi, if I like aiyun go on s.h.e they know your look buy know your name or not is another problem. And how much is they earning and how much is we earning, we spent those money are all into their pocket only. Maybe now I old liao plus no people are giving me money to use therefore I am using my hard earn money so now not so siao and spending so much on them, now even I weekly or u weekly I din buy leh. So due to this two case kena nag by my dad for years when I did some tin wrong. There are other case which is I went to McDonald to work, lucky that he din nag much just saying that I should told him about it, I keep a lot thing from him like having boyfriend, working McDonald. But my luck not very good leh always kena people saw it, work at McDonald is my relative saw it went to tell my dad, bf is my dad friend saw it but bf he din ask much bah, I don’t know y but he din ask much den I dun say so much just say is friend.=X so a lot people think I have no problem with my family I can say your are all wrong, every family has is own problem de just that u can see or not. i dun like his nagging, and saving, he save money but also ask us to save along. There a time in secondary every one start to get hp yet my hp is using my hard save money to get a 2nd hand pone with a top up card, as I am not old enough to sign line and I dun have the money every month to pay the bill. He will always tell me, some of the stuff we dun need den dun any how spent money on it, last time I dun really listen as u try open hand there sure money who will care to go save? But now I change till I dun look like myself too, as every one not around all kind of bill have to pay on your own, how nice the stuff is also no mood to buy to use. yuehe always like to call me aunty, u think I dun wan to wear more nice and beta, if I dun need to worry about my house spending, just I earn how much I spent how much of cause I am able to enjoy and buy stuff, eat good food. Those who know me before will know I last time how good in spending de loh. haha I not finish complaining of my dad, he ah a supper prayer which every day 3 time and some time even going to other people house. If his life can save I will sure want to say him pray so much and eaten veggie for so many year but when your time up you also cant be save your life. But now say what also no use. He very nagging, maybe is due to my mum not around he scare my ah ma cant control me, but is true lah what I doing outside my ah ma also dun really know. But he still very care for me, when I sick he will ask me rest or really need he will bring me see doctor, he give me enough money to spent for my study even some time I am ask more den what I really need. He saved enough money for me to use when he and my ah ma not around so that I dun have so much money problem, he leave me with a flat which he had paid it up. So a nagging dad yet is most caring for me, for my study, for my further, for my living for been along.

So when he was sick having cancels I did my best to accompany him, he dun wants to raise his life for a more detail check up I din stop him. I hate hospital due to my mum reason, yet w/o it my dad also can’t cure. He coughing form morning till nigh, he thin a lot but I did not noted, I am a blur a unless child. Even he is sick I cant do much for him all I can is go back eunos to accompany him but I cant leave my ah ma with the 80+ age alone too. Of cause is due to I am more close with ah ma den dad so I will choose ah ma den my dad. But when he sick I see him getting weaker and weaker, from he can work till he had to give up working to rest at home, he worry to leave me alone he try going around look for Chinese doctor for cure. That time I 18+ liao know how to think, but due to my mum case so when he say worry about going hospital for detail check is not save therefore i also would not want him to suffer ah. But what we wish for god may not hear it, so a few month later his health getting from bad to worse. He starts eating less and less sleeping more, even praying he leave it to me which himself resting in the room. Finally he wanted to go for a detail check but for cancel this kind problem just 1 day late can kill your life. So but the time he agree to go for a detail check is far too late, which he is too weak to do all those kind of check up. That mean they are unable to cure it any more, so he end up waiting to die. I quit angry over myself that time, if only I can ask him go for the detail check maybe there is still hope? I not sure, but that time when I accompany I found he is really lonely. After my mum death he did ask me if he remarry I mind? Of cause I din give him an ans as who dun mind right, but when he going to die then I know I been selfish. I never really go home accompany even find reason saying I busy over school work not going home to stay over night, he also did not say me only asked me study hard and take care. He is nagging yet he cares for me, I know inside my heart yet I cannot treat him nice due to my playful. I never care for him when he is sick, he lonely at home, he stress or angry over work. I never ask much about him, or can say I know noting much of him, he just my dad, he very nagging and crazy about praying, save money king that all I know about him. What he like to eat, what song, drama or what stuff he like I don’t know at all. His last 1month go to a home to stay, see him getting weaker, feed him eat with very small mouth, cant too hot, cant too big spore, de food must small small pieces. I really not use to take care of people till like that, as my mum coma all I need to do is talk or clear her hand some time. But my dad is from he still able walk to toilet till he need stay on the bed to do his business. That time I finish up my ITE got along holiday yet i spent almost all my time and money stay with him. Some more sick people their mood not good, and we young people dun like listen to scolding kind i was sad and hurt by him. My aunty say him, den he say sorry to me, the very first time say sorry, giving me red packet for my birthday and also the last. When he around my mum and me never celebrate birthday de, I mean there no cake, no gift but he will wish me or bring me go eat lah. I been hopping to get a normal dad like other, who he so crazy praying, den we will have really more time together like other dad will bring their child out for a walk, chit chat a bit the best is he and ah ma can live together. if you ask what my dream are, that will be taking a family photos, in my photos album there only a 5year old or younger family photos with my dad, mum and ah ma. Till 12year old we never take another picture.

Today my mood bad, not due to writing my family death but some one had passed away. He not my family, not my friend, not even some one I know. He just a actor, but a cute guy I like going his blog to read because he always post happy stuff unlike me all this emotion kind of post. But sad to say he passed away today, after accompany her mum go for check up got home for a rest he sleep till out of breath, by the time send to hospital was too late. Life short, I understand that when I am age of 12 but till 21 then I know how short was it when just 1 year later my grandma also passes away after my dad leaving my granduncle and me now. I am count as lucky I know but human away not happy with what we have, therefore I am unhappy with all my family member not around, with just a few good friends, with my poly result, with my money, with a lot a lot more. Who can tell me how? I am tired, I wish to rest but I cant because I no people letting me to yi kao.

you care to know more about him the actor who pass away today, go to his blog http://mcking13.spaces.live.com/default.aspx to leave a msg to him and his family. i believe he will get to read it.

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1/04/2008 11:38:00 PM